


Fireworks

by orphan_account



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Confessing Feelings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 07:07:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16970037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It is New Year's Eve and Hotch is acting odd. Spencer thinks it's because of him.





	Fireworks

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting a pic on here! I am not a very experienced writer (yet) and did not have a beta reader for this so please ignore any mistakes. I hope you enjoy!

_ Spencer’s feet dangled off the edge of the pier. Usually he wouldn't come close to the edge, but his heart felt so heavy that it weighed him down; he couldn't fall even if he wanted to. His cold hands pressed into the rough concrete on either side of him in an attempt to ground himself. It wasn't working. All Spencer could think about was what happened back at Rossi’s. _

...

  
The team had returned from a case in Chicago and decided to get together at Rossi’s to celebrate New Year’s Eve. JJ and Derek were unpacking various dishes and drinks from the truck, Spencer was setting up a table of food, Emily and Rossi were preparing drinks, and Aaron was nowhere to be found. He claimed he needed to get something from his apartment before heading to Rossi’s, and he sure was taking his time to do it.

Just as the last dishes were set onto the table and drinks were served, the team heard a knock at the door. Rossi went to answer it and soon returned, one Aaron Hotchner walking behind him wearing an anxious expression. The small talk resumed as Garcia handed Hotch a glass of a fancy drink she didn’t even attempt to pronounce.

Hotch’s eyes met Spencer’s as he set his leather bag on the floor by the couch and joined the team as they filed into the dining room. “What could be troubling him?” Spencer thought, taking his seat at the table. As food was passed around and dished out, pleasant banter ensued and Aaron began to relax. Spencer resolved to asking him about it later.

As dinner came to an end, Rossi, ever the good host, began to clear the table. Garcia and Spencer started consolidating silverware and stacking plates. Aaron jolted slightly when Spencer’s hand brushed Aaron’s shoulder as he reached for a glass. He hoped Spencer hadn’t noticed but the younger man did, in fact, notice. He collected as much as he could and took to the kitchen. Rossi had gone to the freezer in his garage to get the ice cream, so it was just Penelope and Spencer in the room.

“Do you know what’s up with Hotch?” Garcia asked, puzzled. Spencer only shook his head, but couldn’t hide the anxiety bubbling up inside him. Penelope noticed and immediately  said, “Spence, spill it. What’s going on with you and Hotch tonight?”

“I think he knows,” blurted Spencer, “I accidentally brushed his arm when clearing the table and he jumped. Also, he’s been really awkward and distant. Every time we make eye contact he just looks away. How does he know? Am I that obvious?” The young man began to pace and tap his hands on this thighs. “I can’t let something this stupid affect our friendship.”

Garcia put a hand on his shoulder to calm his pacing. Sympathy flooded her face, “Listen, it’s probably nothing. He may just be having an off day; that doesn’t mean you did anything. However, if your feelings are causing you this much stress, maybe it’s time to talk to him about it. Even if he doesn’t feel the same, it’ll help to get it off your chest.”

Spencer’s eyes widened, “I can’t risk that. What if he hates me after? What if he’s secretly homophobic?” Spencer rubbed the back of his neck. “We don’t even know that he’s gay, or even single for that matter. He could have a relationship and not tell us, you know.”

Penelope only raised her eyebrows and looked at him. “You know Hotch is too good a person to be homophobic, and besides, he could never hate you. He’s a mature guy; he’d tell you kindly and directly how he feels. I think you should go for it. Put an end to your misery and all that.”

Spencer turned it over in his mind, but didn’t have time to respond because Rossi arrived with a huge tub of neapolitan ice cream. The three of them made their way back to the main room.

JJ announced for everyone to come outside for fireworks and dessert. Everyone gathered in the living room was now heading to the backyard. Spencer looked to see where Aaron had gone, only to spot him ascending the stairs. Before Spencer had a chance to follow him, he disappeared up the stairs. JJ took one last look before heading outside as well, but upon noticing Aaron’s absence, she sent Spencer to retrieve him.

As Spencer climbed the steps he heard the soft  _ thump _ of the door to the back yard closing and then silence. Suddenly, muffled sniffles and sighs cut through the still air.

“Could that be Aaron?” Spencer thought as he made it to the top step. The door to Rossi’s office was slightly ajar. Spencer pushed it open a little bit. Aaron sat hunched over Rossi’s desk with his head in his hands. His back was towards the younger man so he had not yet noticed his presence. A pit formed in Reid’s stomach at seeing him like this. Aaron was strong, he was a leader, and he never cries.

"Hotch?" Spencer said quietly.

"What? What do you want?" the agent jumped at hearing the other man's voice, but relaxed once he saw it was Spencer. "Oh,” he paused, softening, “It’s nothing. I'm alright."

"Fireworks are going to start soon. It's 11:56," the young doctor pointed out, "JJ sent me up to get you."

"Go ahead without me. I don't think I can be there and I'm pretty sure no one wants me there anyw-"

"I do," Spencer interrupted, "I want you there. And I definitely don't want you to be sad and alone up here." He walks over to his boss, hesitates, but grabs his hands anyway and pulls him up. "You should come, it'll be fun."

"I'm sorry to disappoint, but I really don’t think I’ll be that much fun. I’m not really in the best of moods right now." Aaron answers quietly.

Spencer took this as confirming his theory and his thoughts began to race. Before he could think, he blurted out an “I’m so sorry!” Hotch tried to question him about what he could possibly be sorry for, but the gates were open and there was no stopping him now. “I should’ve known I wouldn’t have been able to keep it from you. Garcia is the only one who knew, but I’m not great at subtlety when it comes to stuff like this. I’m really sorry if I made you uncomfortable in any way; I only ask that we can remain friends” Spencer paused and took a breath. “I never meant for my feelings to cause any problems to get out of hand, but it seems they did anyway. I’m really sorry, Aaron…” he trailed off.

A silence developed between the two. Neither man knew what to say next, until Hotch spoke up. “Spencer… are you saying that you have feelings for me? As in more-than-friends, romantic-type feelings?”

Spencer looked down, focused on the laces of this sneakers. "Yes,” he nearly whispered. Spencer continued to refuse to meet Aaron’s eyes, but Aaron put his hand under his chin and gently tilted his head upwards to see him. After a few moments of Spencer’s guilty eyes locked with Aaron’s understanding ones, the agent pressed his lips against the other man’s.

As the two pulled away, Spencer could see Aaron’s eyes searching, reading, scanning him for any type of reaction.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"Woah..." They heard from behind them. Both men spun around to see Derek standing in the doorway. "JJ sent me up to see what was taking so long. I would say you missed the fireworks, but it seems you've made some of your own. Oh god, the team will not believe this."

Spencer’s hands shook at the thought of being ridiculed by his coworkers and friends so he did only the most logical thing he could think to do and took off down the steps and out the door as fast as he could, leaving the other two boys in shock.

"Don't mention any of this to anyone." And with that Aaron was gone and headed down the stairs.

"What the hell just happened here?" Derek muttered to himself as he stood in the middle of Rossi’s office.

...

Spencer’s thoughts continued to buzz around in his head increasing pressure until they spilled out in tears. He couldn’t make sense of the events that just occured. If Aaron had jumped away from his touch, why had he kissed Reid? A thought entered the genius’ head. “What if Aaron only kissed me because he thought that’s what I wanted? I couldn’t live with myself if he made himself uncomfortable to make me happy.” Just as Spencer was about to drown in his thoughts, he heard footsteps approaching and then felt someone sit down next to him.

"Look, Spence," Aaron rubbed the back of his neck and continued, "I'm really sorry if I made you upset or uncomfortable. I didn't mean to do anything you didn’t want to do or-" Now it was Spencer's turn to cut him off.

"What are you talking about? Did you not hear me just spill my guts to you? I ran off because  _ I  _ was worried I did something to make  _ you _ uncomfortable." Spencer brushed his cheeks with his sleeve and took a deep breath. "Hotch," he started, "what did that kiss mean? Did you only do it because I told you about my feelings?”

"Of course not Spencer! I was trying to say that the feelings were mutual but we were interrupted. I told him not to say anything by the way." Hotch paused and then turned to face Spencer. The younger man felt a hand on his and turned to face the man next to him.

"M-mutual?" Spencer stuttered. "He must be joking," he thought, unable to fathom Aaron returning his feelings.

"Spencer, why did you think I jumped when you brushed my shoulder? Why do you think I've been to awkward around you?" Hotch let out a stressed laugh. "You may be a genius but I was being so obvious. I can't seem to stay calm when you're around. Its like your presence sends electricity through my veins. You really didn't know?"

Spencer shook his head. "I thought you were acting unusual because you figured out I liked you and you felt uncomfortable. I never even considered you feeling the same."

At this point, both men relaxed and let out nervous chuckles. The air was clear and misunderstandings swept away. After a beat, Spencer asked "What now?"

Aaron responded by getting up and offering his hand to Spencer. Even as the two stood side by side and began walking back to Rossi’s, he didn’t let go. “Now, we go back to the others, have a great time, and not worry about what the rest of the team thinks because they’re our friends and they’ll never let anything get in the way of that.”

They returned to the house in peaceful silence and walked right inside upon arrival. The team was gathered in the living room with beverages, chatting with each other. The two started to unclasp their hands but first, Rossi gestured to them and happily announced “Finally!” to the whole room. Neither Aaron nor Spencer felt ashamed or nervous as they sat next to each other on the couch and enjoyed the company of their friends.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


End file.
